My life is glamorous

As I'm cleaning Milo's bottom in the living room after he decided to take a dump in his pants: "Mom, don't get poop on your fancy dress!" (My fancy dress was an apron).

Target Date: Dec 2011

My tenure committee met today, and we decided to target my case for divisional committee for their December meeting next year. (The committee meets once a month starting in December, so your case can be decided as early as December or as late as May).

We have to get the department to agree to let me go up in December, which they may not necessarily do because they're going to be strategic about which case to put up when. Probably 3 of us will go up next year and the idea is to maximize chances of success for all three of us, so my needs alone won't determine when my case goes up. But I hope they'll let me do it in December.

I can tell I'm ready, because I want it to be done. I have reached the "screw it" phase, and don't want to wait until, say, May even though that might mean one more article on my cv. It would be a Merry Christmas indeed next year if it came on the heels of a positive tenure decision.

Mentor and I will begin writing the case this coming semester. It'll take several months to compile everything and get the case written. We'll solicit external letters in May. They'll come back in August. Then it's onwards and upwards.

Random little things from my meeting. My committee consists of 4 people whose job is to craft my case and guide me through tenure. Two of those people are current or recent divisional committee members. One was chair last year (the year that very committee denied my colleague). Anyway he kept going back to my career grant. He said, "It's very hard for the committee to ignore a career award," and "The career award is the jewel in the crown." Dang I'm glad that grant came through. It's a little freaky to realize how capricious it all is.

The other member, who is currently on the divisional committee and herself received tenure about 6 years ago remarked that if her case had gone up under the current committee, she absolutely wouldn't have gotten tenure. And this is a person who -- well let's just say she's very well known and well respected and is now an internationally successful leader in her field. It strikes me as obvious that any system with this much variance is inherently flawed.

Scattered Thoughts

Preschool is on holiday for 2 weeks. The way we're working it out this week is, I worked today (Sunday) and will go to work tomorrow (Monday). Jake works Tuesday and Wednesday. I work Thursday, my folks come that day. We'll both take Friday (Christmas Eve) off.

I like working on Sundays because nobody is ever in the office and I get a lot done. Today I finished final edits on an article (which is heading out the door, hooray), reviewed and revised a chapter for a book I'm co-authoring, reviewed and revised a chapter outline for a different book I'm co-authoring, and wrote a letter of recommendation.

Tomorrow I have my tenure review committee meeting, then another meeting about a grant application that's due on the 27th, then a phone conference with the co-authors of book #1, then a meeting with a student. The phone conference may be interesting because I don't have much of a voice.

I am feeling sad for Nora right now. All I ever did was cough this weekend, it was scary and upsetting for her, and then I couldn't do my normal thing like read books. Milo is not a fan of this either, but because Jake is his favorite parent he is primarily okay. But since I am Nora's favorite parent she is all freaked out and not pleased and cried and cried when I had to go to work. She is so sad. Poor thing.

After (sort of) sleeping on the couch all night so that I could be propped up and give Jake a chance at sleep, I went back to bed at 8 a.m. for a long nap. I had to tell myself, "You are not being lazy. You are sick. You need to sleep. You are not being lazy." It worked, I fell asleep and then had a dream in which I was in labor with a baby girl. It was Dec. 22 in my dream and the kids had just turned 3, and I was thinking, Nora will be a big sister and Milo will be a big brother to our new baby girl. Seeing as how Dec. 22 is 3 days away I hope this doesn't mean I'm one of those freaky people (aka Peggy in Mad Men) who can have a baby full term and never realize they're pregnant. I have never understood that and it seems literally impossible unless you're in some sort of serious denial.

Both kids desperately need haircuts. Will I manage to fit that in this week with everything else? Time will tell.

Everything Hurts

Today we got a Christmas tree the easy way. (There was no chopping down involved. No tromping through the snow.) I got a lot sicker today, which seems kind of inexplicable. I used to think of myself as a really healthy person. The cold or flu that would down everybody else for a week would pass through me in 3 days. Now it's the opposite, and I consistently get sicker than anyone else for longer and always end up with bronchitis. I was up between 2:30 a.m. and 5:30 a.m. what with the coughing and all, and later this afternoon I just crashed. I slept in the living room while the kids went crazy and Jake got dinner ready and only woke up to the sound of an ornament crashing and breaking on the floor right in front of me. (It was an egg. A real egg that had been hollowed out and painted.)

Milo was super psyched about the tree and decorating it and everything. Nora was kind of in the dumps today, so she was less jazzed about everything but still enjoyed opening up each ornament and hanging it on the tree.

I think the preschool teachers were a little confused about what holiday we celebrate because Nora had mentioned that we didn't have a Christmas tree, and Milo said that for the holiday he got "dry bread". I still have no idea what "dry bread" means or what he was referring to. (I wanted to wait until after their birthday to get a tree to try to separate birthday from Christmas somewhat.)

The kids' preschool teachers are older women, one seems like maybe she's in her 50's (she has grown-up kids) and the other is maybe in her 30s. But they also have an afternoon teacher who comes in who is clearly pretty young and doesn't seem like she has her own family yet. Nora loves all three of them. So on Friday I finally screwed up the courage to ask the afternoon teacher if she ever did any babysitting, and she said yes, all the time, and she'd love to watch Milo & Nora. So that is a good thing.

Things I used to do when I felt like ass: Sleep, watch t.v., lie around in bed, drink 7-up or ginger ale with crushed ice cubes.

Things I now do when I feel like ass: Laundry, making lunch, grocery shopping, hauling a Christmas tree into the house, grading, etc.

I kind of wonder if this is why I cannot get healthy this year. But these things have to get done.

I thought of something good to write about. This year I got a new winter coat. My old one was kind of falling apart so it was time for something new and I'm talking about the extreme winter coat, the one you haul out on the coldest days. Must be long, must be down. So I bought the Land's End Chevron Coat and oh my gosh I cannot say enough good things about this coat! This coat has totally changed everything. It is seriously the warmest coat I have ever had. It goes all the way down to my knees, has fleece cuffs and a fleece neck, and this awesome big hood that fits over my hat and acts as a wind break for my face.

So the first time I wore it was when our weather changed quite abruptly to Very Cold (tm). And I live in a place where we have a lot of Very Cold days, for many months, so you need to have the gear for it. Anyway, I was walking to work that morning and it was about 4 degrees out. Jake was going on and on about how cold it was going to be. I walked outside and I thought, hmm, I guess they were wrong, it's totally not cold at all! Then I pulled my hand out to put on my glove and I realized oh, it is cold. I just feel super warm because I have this amazing crazy warm coat! And it's not like I didn't have down coats before, I did, but this one is like an order of magnitude warmer. It is so warm that if I have it zipped up and it's warmer than about 20 degrees, I get hot.

So anyway, I feel very happy about my warm, snuggly coat and its ability to keep me more comfortable in the winter. It really goes to show that something as simple as a properly warm coat just makes a ton of difference in your quality of life.

I know this is boring. I can't help it. I don't have anything interesting in me. This is my 3rd bad cough of 2010...enough is enough. I am too tired to keep going! I know, complain, complain, complain. At least none of my limbs have been chopped off. It could be worse.

Hmmmm

All of this sickness and lack of family nearby and winter crap has me thinking about the fact that Portland State just advertised a job in my area. Portland is where my cousins and aunt and uncle live, as well as a couple of friends from high school and a grad school friend. It is on the west coast, much closer to all of my family. Driving distance to my sister and (more or less) to my parents.

Upon first reaction Jake gave it a thumbs down saying PSU wouldn't pay me enough for us to afford to live there. Which is probably true, we probably couldn't afford the house and neighborhood similar to what we have now. But still, it has me wondering and it is kind of tempting...

WHATEVER

I have to stay home tomorrow with one or two sick kids (I hope it's just one, because the fighting makes the day so much harder). This is what, the 5th time I've done this this year? The 10th time? I've lost count. All I know is that I haven't taken an evening off in weeks, I'm constantly sick myself, I'm dragged into the ground, exercise is a thing of the past, and yet I'm still behind on work. And it's only December. We're only getting started with the flu and cold season.

This is truly untenable, but there is no decent solution in sight. I could take them out of school and lose a month's tuition and try to find a nanny again, but I feel like they've had enough change in their lives. Plus, school is good for them. When it's not trying to kill them with viruses. And it's hard to find part-time babysitters who can work on any random day with no advanced notice when a kid gets sick.

How do other people do this???

Okay, well, it's 7:30 so back to work. I told myself I'd give myself 15 minutes of fun between 7:15 and 7:30. I have to spend every night trying to make up for what I lost during the day...

They're 3 but one of them is sick

Last night I burned the first batch of cupcakes for the kids because I was upstairs dealing with a child in bed and didn't hear the beep go off. Seriously burned them, they all had to be thrown out. Then I had to start all over again. Such a mess. Then as I was hurrying downstairs my slippery socks slipped out from under me and I fell hard on my back and on my wrist. So now I'm in a world of hurt. I can tell nothing is truly hurt or broken, I'm just a sore mess, and feeling pissed off about it.

Today I brought mini cupcakes and cups of berries to the kids' school for their birthday. They were so excited to have me there for snack time. By the end of the day, though, Nora was a miserable mess who didn't want any dinner. I took her temperature before bed: 104 degrees. It really is true that the illnesses are so frequent that they just blend into each other. Nora hasn't even stopped coughing from her former illness (neither have I). And tonight both Jake and I have sore throats. I knew the kids would get sick a lot, but I really underestimated what it would be like. I also didn't really think about how this would mean that I would be sick all the time too.

Milo is still cheerful and healthy...for now.

Also, apparently he saw me writing about Nora's name and didn't want to be outdone, so tonight he wrote "HI" and then said, kind of surprised, "Hey! It's a Hi!" It is awesome to watch these kids begin to make sense of words and symbols.

p.s. The cat just took a dump in the dining room. WTF?!? We have enough problems!

Birthday Future

I leave work a little early, walking through the crisp cold air in the darkness, a flashing light on my backpack to warn cyclists on the path that I am there. My phone vibrates as I pull my hat on: Jake has texted me, "Kids asked for Thai, so I ordered curry and noodles. Should be here by the time you arrive. Hurry home!" I step up the pace a little bit, thinking about that soft fluffy rice and the golden curried potatoes swimming in sauce. A few light snowflakes begin to fall on the bare street.

The house is lit up when I walk up the driveway, and as I open the door the warmth and delicious aroma of Thai food hits me in the face. Christmas music is playing. I sit down to take off my boots and my scarf, and Milo comes racing into the kitchen in his socks, sliding around the corner. "Mom! It's supposed to be a blizzard tonight! We're going to have a snow day tomorrow, I just know it!" "Huh," I say, "Well, it was starting to snow just now. So, you never know, I guess." I shrug off my backpack and walk into the kitchen, where Jake is setting out plates and cups. He grins over the bags of takeout and glances over at Nora, perched on the bar stool and studiously writing something.

"Hi Sweetie," I say, kissing Nora's head. "Moooom," she drags it out into two syllables, "I'm busy planning out our day tomorrow, since we're not going to have school." "You two seem awfully confident," I say, hoping they won't be too disappointed if they don't get a snow day for their birthday. Milo bounces around the kitchen, and says "We're going to make it happen. We're wearing our pajamas inside out tonight, and we're going to sleep with spoons under our pillows." "And we're going to flush an ice cube down the toilet," Nora solemnly informs me. "It's guaranteed to work!" says Milo. I ask, "If it's guaranteed to work, why don't you do that every night?" Milo rolls his eyes. "Well of course it wouldn't work if we did it every night!"

As we eat our dinner the snow falls more heavily, and Nora and Milo are bursting with excitement. They flush the ice cube down the toilet, put their pajamas on inside out, and shove spoons beneath their pillows. The snow swirls around the house. I kiss each of them good night, and I tell Milo "We'll still have a great birthday tomorrow, even if you do have school. Don't forget, we're having the skating party at 3:30." He looks at me seriously. "We're not going to have school tomorrow, Mom. Just wait. You'll see."

That night Jake and I stay up late. He watches a movie while I finish up some last-minute grading, sipping on a mug of hot chocolate. A fire crackles in the fireplace. The snow keeps coming, the flakes huge and thick, and just before I head to bed at midnight, the text comes to my phone: "All schools in Dane County closed for Thursday, December 14." I'm relieved and excited. I knew the kids would be fine either way, but starting their birthday with the excitement of a snow day instead of the disappointment of another school morning was going to make the day extra special.

By the time I wake up, the light is filtering in through the windows, and I can smell pancakes downstairs. Looking outside, I see a whopping foot or more of snow, but it seems to be done for the morning. Our little drive is completely snowed in; the plow hasn't come by yet. I check my email to find out that the university has also closed down for the first time in 8 years. I think back to how the last time the university closed, the kids were just turning 2 and Nora cried every time we took her out into the snow.

I wander downstairs and Jake has a plate of pancakes on the table. "They're already outside skating," he tells me. "They ran over to Millie's and Rueben's and rounded them up for an impromptu game on the ice." I glance out the window and see the kids skating on the rink. I open the door for a moment and the cold air hits, as do the sounds of excited voices and laughter on the rink. I pause for a beat and every moment of their lives slams into me: The doctor's appointments. The injections. That first ultrasound, when we saw two tiny beating hearts, and I started sobbing in relief. The IVs. The 2 a.m. feedings. The reflux. The diapers. Potty training. The first day of school. The accidents, the bumps and bruises, the visits to the emergency room, the worrying. The kisses, the sudden hugs, the tiny hands gripping my own.

I mentally try to stop time, to remember this, all of it. Because I know that the next 10 years are going to go by as quickly as the first 10 have, and I'm going to turn around and they'll be all grown up.

Realization

I have a kid who can recognize words, count, and practically write her name, and yet the simple act of peeing in the potty seems to elude her. Doesn't this seem a little backwards? Dogs can be potty trained. Cats can be potty trained. Why can't (or WON'T) my obviously bright kid bring herself to pee in the potty? Sheesh.

p.s.

There should be a special circle of hell for editors who make you add 8 separate significant things to an article, and then tell you that it is too long and you need to trim 5-10 pages. Seriously.

Grocery lists and letters

Today the kids got some paper and decided to make grocery lists:

Nora: I'm getting cilantro, cupcakes, and juice. That's all I need!

Milo: I'm going to put 45 things on my list.

Amy: What are you going to put on your list Milo?

Milo: I'm going to put strawberries on.

Nora: I'm going to buy a lot of things in my store Milo!

Milo: I'm going to get strawberries and cupcakes because it's my birthday.

Amy: What else is going on your list Milo?

Milo: Milk.

Nora: Juice!

Milo: I like maple juice.

Nora: There's maple syrup in my juice Mommy. I'm gonna bring yummy juice! So. Do we have pasta? Do we have pasta Mom?

Amy: Yes.

Nora: So we're going to have pasta, meatballs, ketchup. That's what I need at the store.

We had to shovel out from a snowstorm today. It wasn't as much as everybody thought it would be, but it was a good heavy 6 inches or so. Luckily we now have helpers:

I was just looking over photos and saw that we had a big snowstorm on the same date last year too.

So I have this iPad game that has kids trace the letters for various words like "cup", "cat", and "owl". (Actually just those 3 -- it's the free demo version). Nora has been playing it. She also knows how to draw an N, because her name starts with N. But today, she took a piece of paper and told me she was going to write somebody's name. So I said, "Okay, write your name". So she said "N" (and wrote an N), "O" (and wrote an o), "R" (and then didn't write an R, probably because it isn't in that free iPad demo so she hasn't been writing Rs), and "A" and then she wrote an A! I took a picture of it: You can see the N, the O, a space for the R with nothing there, the A, and then some scribbles. I had no idea Nora could practically write her name.

R's are going to be tough, though, because letters with curves are tough. The kids much prefer letters like M, N, and H.

I can hear Milo playing upstairs in his room with his new teaching clock from Grandma and Grandpa instead of going to bed. But I am too tired to walk up there just yet and put a stop to it -- maybe in 5 minutes...

Sniffle

Last class of the semester today. They were great students, and I will miss them. That is all.

Bad Host

So I have this philosophy that I shouldn't do Jake's social work for him just because I'm the woman. The type of work I'm talking about is remembering his relatives' birthdays, sending cards to his relatives, dealing with presents etc., and preparing for their visits. These are all things I do for my own family and friends, and Jake never does that for my family or friends (because why would he?), and these are things he did for his own family and friends before he ever met me, of course. So I don't believe I should suddenly start doing them just because we got married.

However, if you're going to follow this philosophy, you have to be willing to look like an asshole.

So there is that downside. The problem is that everybody assumes these things are my job. My take on it is, I have a job. In fact, I am and always have been the primary wage earner for our family. My job is the far more demanding and stressful one. I do not believe it is then also my job to keep track of his extended family's birthdays or prepare grocery lists and shopping before they visit. That should be Jake's realm.

But if you're married to a guy who doesn't really give a crap, and probably won't do a whole lot, then you have to be willing to just accept that. Because I'm not going to nag him to do that stuff. The nagging becomes its own job. But if I'm not going to do it myself, and I'm not going to nag, well then, I have to be willing to look bad. And be negatively gossiped about.

For instance, consider my baby shower. This was a shower that some of Jake's relatives threw for me. During this shower, Jake's mother started telling everybody that if they ever visit us, they had better be prepared to bring their own food with them because we won't feed them. I was pretty embarrassed. I think she had visited somewhat recently and Jake hadn't prepared a formal meal plan for breakfast, lunch, and dinner that weekend. He had made stuff for dinner but breakfast and lunch were more "fend for yourself" situations where he had their favorite cereal and bagels and fruit on hand, but he did not, you know, make an omelette. They were put out by this (they expect hot cooked meals 3 times a day plus mid-afternoon snack and cocktails). Ever since, my MiL has told the extended family that I don't cook and I don't prepare for guests and we never have any food in the house. So now I have that reputation.

And I guess they're right, in a way -- if it's Jake's family, I do expect him to do the heavy lifting and the preparations, the same way I do for my own family and friends. So I guess it's fair to say that I am personally a lame host, because I shift it all over to my husband. But still, it is kind of an embarrassing reputation to have, but it's something I have to be willing to accept in order to not take on all of this extra CEO-of-the-house work that I do not want to do just because I am the wife.

So I am writing all of this because Jake's parents are coming this weekend, just for 48 hours. I asked him if he had thought at all about what he would feed them on Friday for dinner (he hadn't), or the rest of the weekend, and maybe he should consider doing some grocery shopping. So tonight he reluctantly went to the store. First he called his folks to see if they wanted anything particular. And mostly his mom is concerned that there will be a birthday cake. Jake said, "Well, Amy is going to make cupcakes on their actual birthday, which isn't until Tuesday you know, and bring them to school. Because Nora asked for that specifically, and the kids are pretty excited about the idea of cupcakes." And then a bunch of silence. And then "But..." and "Yeah, but..." and "Well, maybe, but..." etc. Basically his mom is worked up because she wants us to bake a cake this weekend. Even though their birthday is not this weekend, and they don't want cake, they want cupcakes. She wants a cake.

Enter asshole Amy again. I basically said, you want to make a cake, go for it. I'm going to be spending the weekend doing my last-minute frantic revisions on my paper that is due Monday the 13th. I'm not going to be spending that time baking a cake. However, the down side of this stance is the inevitable gossip. Amy's not even making a cake for her kids' birthday!

Good Morning

I just have to note the amazing fact that the kids have had a great morning at home today. They played by themselves (together) a fair amount without fighting hardly at all. I heard one argument about a fire truck, but they resolved it on their own. There were no tantrums, screams, or whines this morning. They helped me do the laundry, and then they did some painting, and then they helped me make and freeze a bunch of waffles. Milo enjoyed watching for the green light on the waffle iron to come on to tell me they were ready. They ate a great breakfast, had a little waffle snack in the middle of the morning, and then had a good lunch. They did lots of pretend play and just generally were delightful and cheerful.

I really hope this is a glimpse into the future. I know they'll always fight, and there will be wrinkles, but just watching the kids happily play on their own for 20 or 30 minutes is a huge delight and relief to me.

It's only getting up to 21 degrees today, so I don't have much energy or desire to take them out. Which I think is okay -- now that they're in school 4 days a week, busy busy busy, it can be nice to have a calm, relaxing, stay-at-home day in the middle of the day. It's nice to go out on errands or little trips, but for today, we're just staying inside and playing. I felt like I should note the fact that for once, both kids actually had a good day.

Deeply Exploring

Here is a picture from our weekly newsletter from the kids' preschool. The caption reads, "Nora deeply explores the qualities of color and line as she paints at the easel and at the tiny table."

I bet you didn't know my kid was deeply exploring the qualities of color and line. I didn't either. That's what the school is for, I guess. It is, after all, a preschool of the ARTS. So, they are super into dance, drawing, painting, sculpting, music, storytelling, etc. They are not, by the way, into math.

I think this is a problem in general but isn't a problem for my kids. I can handle the math at home. I definitely cannot handle the arts, so I'm glad somebody else is taking care of that.

Fleet & Farm

I am still really sick. Too sick to really remember anything cute the kids did this weekend, even though they did do cute things. I'm pretty sure.

I made good progress on my paper revision today. This has made me very, very happy.

One thing this tenure-track life has robbed from me is the ability to just be sick. To be sick and stay home on the sofa with tissues and cold medication and a good book and nap. To not work on deadlines and travel to and from DC and meet with students and teach my classes.

That is an element of "balance" I would like to regain after all this is over.

Milo's favorite animal is a tiger. Nora's favorite animal is a penguin, which was news to me. I got a tiny tiger and a tiny penguin for their stockings at Fleet & Farm today while I was there picking up cracked corn kernels for the kids' sensory table at school. Because the thing that makes sense for me to spend my Sunday morning doing is poring over various elements to go in sensory tables as I cough bloody phlegm into my tissue and mentally pore over the next set of revisions I will do to my paper. Because that is how I should be spending my time. I kind of hate myself right now, that I am doing bullshit things like that.

You really know you're in the midwest, though, when you spend some time in a Fleet & Farm. You can pick up a Christmas tree, a set of waders, ammo, and deer feed all in the same spot.

Addendum to last post

One of the people in a grad class I teach is actually a visiting scholar I am hosting from China. From our skyping session she noticed that I have a cold, so she sent me the method her family uses to cure a cold: Fill a giant bucket with very hot water. Put your feet in it. Keep the water hot. Stay there for about half an hour until you're sweating all over. At the same time, drink some boiling water with ginger. Then get a good night's sleep.

Sounds more pleasant than swallowing giant horse pills, maybe I'll give it a try!

Weird Things from my Trip

1) Well, I already shared the weirdest thing, which was my colleague outing himself as the dreaded Reviewer A. Man! Still getting over that one!

2) Also, on my first night I needed to get a can of soda to drink some pills with. (Sounds healthy, doesn't it). Anyway, I have an issue with swallowing pills. It's lame and it's basically that I have never mastered this basic adult competency of swallowing pills. If they're little I can handle it but if they're big it can be a problem. I have all of these weird factors that have to be in place, like I can't swallow a pill with just water, it has to be something with a strong flavor like orange juice or carbonated soda. I have to have a morsel of something to eat to chase down the pill or else I'll feel a lump in my throat all night. Even with these things in place half the time I fail at swallowing the pill and will gag it back up, slamming my hand down on the table with emphasis, arching my back, leaning way back to get gravity to help, trying to wrangle that thing down my throat.

So anyway I went to the vending closet to get ice and soda. It was a literal closet. The bottles of soda were $2.50. Crazy! But I was desperate. I plugged my 10 quarters into the machine. But nothing happened. I hit the button. No soda came out. I hit the change button, but I didn't get my change back. I didn't have enough change to try again with another machine. Hmmm, not good. I needed my cold medication to go to sleep.

Then I noticed that there was a weird handle on the machine that was...out. I started twisting it. It twisted and twisted and twisted. And then as I was twisting it, the machine opened up right in front of me! I peered in. It was empty, no bottles. It wasn't even running. No wonder I didn't get my money back. Then I realized I could open this other little door to get my money. So I did, and then piles and piles and piles and piles of coins spilled out onto the floor, creating a huge pyramid of coins!

So I picked out my 10 quarters, and then put the rest of the coins back into the machine, which was a pain, and then closed it all up, and twisted that handle again and again to secure it, and then walked up to the next floor and managed to successfully get my bottle of soda, swallow my pills (no gagging), and go to bed.

3) Our hotel is literally 2 blocks from the White House. You can look down the street and see it there, all lit up. You can wander up to the gates and gaze upon it. I should have brought my camera. Our hotel is in a totally great location.

4) I think one of my work friends, who is married, is trying to have an affair with another of my work friends, who is recently not married. It is weird and disconcerting for me to watch this play out; it plays itself out at conferences since they are in different parts of the country.

5) I taught my class remotely by Skyping in. The classroom has a laptop hooked up to a giant smart board. It worked surprisingly well. I could see everybody in the class and they could see me, and we could have a conversation that way. However, the internet connection started to get wonky towards the end and this was a significant problem.

6) My eye started hurting and getting all bloodshot and then pus started leaking out of it. So I guess it's just part of the virus that M&N gave me. Pus eye and all. Attractive, huh. I finally caved and started taking my gigantic impossible-to-swallow antibiotic, because I draw the line at pus-sy eyes.

7) (Gee, wonder why no colleagues ever want to start up affairs with me? Must have something to do with #6 and how uber-sexy I am what with the leaking eyes and all....)

Feeling a little better

Milo: Mommy can we watch a Caillou video?

Me: Okay...

Me: Wait...did you ask Daddy already?

Milo: Yeah.

Me: What did he say?

Milo: ...Mommy I love you.

[Milo gives me a big hug]

This is suspicious because Milo isn't exactly a font of unsolicited affection. We go downstairs.

Me: Did Milo ask you if he could watch a video?

Jake: Yeah.

Me: What did you say?

Jake: I said not until I get back from the store.

Why that little! I thought that was a big-kid gambit!